It is not that the women do not like rape. They like sometimes. They willingly. That is the psychology. Outwardly they show some displeasure, but inwardly they do not.

Culture of Rape and Lust

Sex is an itch

DEVOTEE (1): ...I was reading in the paper the other day that now in England they have passed a law whereby a man cannot be convicted of rape if he honestly believes that the woman consented to be raped.

PRABHUPADA: Yes, that is law always. Rape means without consent, sex. Otherwise there is no rape. There was a rape case in Calcutta, and the lawyer was very intelligent. He some way or other made the woman admit, "Yes, I felt happiness." So he was released. "Here is consent." And that's a fact. Because after all, sex, rape or no rape, they will feel some pleasure. So the lawyer by hook and crook made the woman agree, "Yes, I felt some pleasure." "Now, there is consent." So he was released. After all, it is an itching sensation. So either by force or by willingly, if there is itching, everyone feels relieved itching it. That's a psychology. It is not that the women do not like rape. They like sometimes. They willingly. That is the psychology. Outwardly they show some displeasure, but inwardly they do not. This is the psychology.

DEVOTEE (1): So what this law means is that anybody can rape anybody.

PRABHUPADA: There is no law; it is all lusty desire. Law or no law, these are all nonsense. It is lusty desire, that's all. Everyone wants to fulfill a lusty desires. So unless one is in the mode of goodness or transcendental [to the modes of nature – ignorance, passion, goodness], everyone will like. That is the material world, rajas-tamah. Rajas-tamo-bhavah kama-lobhadayash cha ye [Srimad-Bhagavatam 1.2.19: "As soon as irrevocable loving service is established in the heart, the effects of nature's modes of passion and ignorance, such as lust, desire and hankering, disappear from the heart. Then the devotee is established in goodness, and he becomes completely happy."]. It is all discussed in the shastra. Just like I am hungry man. There is foodstuff. I want to eat it. So if I take by force, that is illegal, and if I pay for it, then it is legal. But I am the hungry man, I want it. This is going on. Everyone is lusty. Therefore they say "legalized prostitution." They want it. So marriage is something legalized, that's all. The passion and the desire is the same, either married or not married. So this Vedic law says, "Better married. Then you will be controlled." Married life... So he will not be so lusty as without married life. So the grihastha [married] life is a concession – same lusty desire under rules and regulation. That's all. That is our higher path. Without married life he will commit rapes in so many ways, so better let him be satisfied with one, both the man and woman, and make progress in spiritual life. That is concession. Everyone in this material world has come with these lusty desires and greediness. Even demigods like Lord Shiva, Lord Brahma... The Lord Brahma became lusty after his daughter. And Lord Shiva became so mad after Mohini-murti. So what to speak of us insignificant creatures? Lusty desire is there. That is material world. Unless one is fully Krishna conscious, this lusty desire cannot be checked. It is not possible.

Exceptions to the rule

DEVOTEE (1): So how is it that Lord Brahma is a pure devotee...

PRABHUPADA: No, he is not pure devotee.

DEVOTEE (1): He's not.

PRABHUPADA: Anyone who is in the material world, he is not pure devotee. He has to become a pure devotee. But there are pure devotees. They come. They are not subjected to all this. They come for the deliverance of the fallen souls. They are above Lord Brahma, Lord Shiva.

DEVOTEE (2): So, Srila Prabhupada, isn't Lord Brahma the original spiritual master in our sampradaya?

PRABHUPADA: Yes. But we should take that it was his lila [pastime] to show that "Even I am subjected. How much you should take risk here." We should take like that because he's our guru. We should not take him that he was subjected to lusty desires, but he made a show that "Even I am also subjected." And he gave up this, changed the body for that. Therefore we should not observe if there is a show of fault of the guru. We should take a different way. Tejiyasam na doshaya [SB 10.33.29: "Shukadeva Gosvami said: The status of powerful controllers is not harmed by any apparently audacious transgression of morality we may see in them, for they are just like fire, which devours everything fed into it and remains unpolluted."]. Just like the sun is soaking water from urine, but we should not imitate that – "We also, let us take urine." Then you'll die. He can do so. Tejiyasam na doshaya. The sun can do that. Still he is not affected. Everyone knows the sun soaks water from the urine. But should you imitate that: "Oh, let me take urine"? No. It is not for you. That is advised. Ishvaranam, those who are ishvaras, the controllers, there is no fault. You should not imitate them; simply you should imitate their instruction. Not that their activities which we may not understand, why he is doing that.

Sex addiction therapy

PARAMAHAMSA: In the beginning stage of devotional service when we are trying to make advancement, we have to tolerate the urges of the senses. But is there a point...

PRABHUPADA: That is tapasya [austerity].

PARAMAHAMSA: Yes.

PRABHUPADA: That is tapasya, that voluntarily we accept some inconvenience. That is called tapasya. Tapasa brahmacharyena [SB 6.1.13]. The tapasa means first brahmacharya, how to avoid sex desire. That is the first tapasa. Tapasa brahmacharyena samena va, yamena niyamena va, damena tyagena satya-shauchabhyam [SB 6.1.13]. The steps are there. So tapasya means first brahmacharya, how to restrain this sex desire. That is first step.

Where is their tapasya? "It is very difficult to do this tapasya. Oh." Therefore Chaitanya Mahaprabhu has given harer nama [Chaitanya-charitamrita Adi 17.21: “‘In this Age of Kali there is no other means, no other means, no other means for self-realization than chanting the holy name, chanting the holy name, chanting the holy name of Lord Hari.’"]. If you chant Hare Krishna mantra regularly, you'll be cured. Otherwise, regular tapasya is almost impossible nowadays.

PARAMAHAMSA: Is there a stage after a person becomes completely purified...?

PRABHUPADA: The students, they are going to school, college, and they are talking of sex. Where is tapasya? How it is possible? So therefore bhakti-yoga is the only way of spiritual improvement in this age – all ages, especially in this age. No other method will help you – yoga, karma, jñana, nothing. Bhakti-yoga is always strong, especially in this age, Kali-yuga. Therefore it is said, kalau nasty eva nasty eva nasty eva, [meaning] especially. Harer nama harer nama harer namaiva kevalam, kalau nasty eva gatir anyatha. [Cc. Adi 17.21]. This is the simplest. But people do not know what is the ultimate goal of life. They are so much in ignorance. They do not know what is spiritual life, what is ultimate goal. Simply like cats and dogs. The dog jumps over with four legs, and if a man can jump over with four wheels, then that is advance. Just see. They think, "Now we are advanced. We have got four-wheel car to jump over. And the dog is jumping with legs. Therefore this is advanced." They do not know this is also the same dog's business. They do not know it. ...After his much advancement of civilization, he is doing the same business. The tiger is also eating flesh and blood, and human being – a scientific slaughterhouse. The same business, but they have got scientific instrument how to cut the throat quickly. This is the advance, advancement of civilization. The dog and cat are having sex on the open street, and now they are talking of homosex in the school, colleges for education. This is their position. They do not know even what is the standard of human civilization. If you are doing the same business like ordinary animals, then where is the advancement of civilization?